‘Hang on… I’m sure something’s on the other side’

‘Well, while you’ve checking I’ll put it on’

‘Wait there. Let me just have a look’

‘Give me that remote’

‘What’s the point on changing it before I’ve checked, you’ll only have to change again’

‘That’s the whole point of a remote, it’s not like you have to get up yourself, mind you, you could do with the exercise’

‘I’m looking @ the TV guide, I’m not listening to you’

‘Deaf as well as fat; well I never’

‘Not listening’

(Silence)

‘I was right, football’s on’

I am NOT watching football when my favourite show is on’

‘You can watch it on the old black and white set downstairs’

‘The whole point of a cookery show is to see what the food looks like, I want to see it in colour’

‘Well, I don’t…its Italy Vs Spain and you know my uncle’s Italian’

WENDY 5/00